easter pics

I do not find as much time to stare at Coline as I did with Leila and yet what could be more important and urgent than that?

Meanwhile, Leila is learning how to be a school teacher (I had forgotten how my teachers used to point at books this way for the whole class to see and was touched to find this memory hiding in a soft spot of mine).

April 21st was a public holiday here and we received the visit of Cristiano's sister (tia Sandra) and her boyfriend,

vovo Rosa and Debora and Danilo (Leila and Coline's cousins)

Today was easter Sunday and the streets in the center of Ouro Preto were covered with these "rugs" made of wood chips of all colors.

We enjoyed a beautiful day with our friends Munyke, Rafael and Anita.

And Coline gave a public performance of peace in the bucket. She does not seem to get enough of this blissful experience.

Oh, and this pic of Leila behind her magnifying glass I find just too cute and funny for me not to share it with you.

1 month already

Coline loves her new bucket bathtub and Leila loves it when Coline has a bath. It is not free of trouble because Leila thinks that Coline is a doll whose hair has to be combed and massaged and styled ("so that it does not go into her eyes") with passion, and so my job has been to avoid Coline being poked in the eyes.

Leila loves poking, and touching people's ears, and checking how far Coline's limbs - and my patience - can stretch. Lately, as we are in a 5-days easter week-end, meaning 5 days without school, my patience has lost elasticity, but I am working on it. And I get lots of help for that. Since mamie-Claire left Silvia has been taking care of Coline every morning for an hour or two so that I can go for a walk with Leila. And so we go and explore the neighborhood and have a picnic of fruit juice and pao de queijo while I think of the next trick to divert Leila from asking me to carry her.

We have had some tricky times as well, when Leila had pneumonia (and this is how I had "baby-Leila" back in a sling), and later when Coline had laryngitis. Everybody is much healthier now, even though we all have a sore throat (Leila gets it from shouting. I get it from not shouting. I wonder why Coline got it). Leila wants to be in my arms whenever Coline gets a feed, but general accept the one-arm compromise that is offered to her, in particular when the Sound of Music distracts her in the background. She currently loves doing the opposite to what we ask her to do (such as not slamming the door because Coline just fell asleep) but she generally is a happy little almost 3-year old who enjoys dancing, singing, and just discovered girly fashion and changing her clothes 10 times a day.

So far Coline has been a super-chilled baby who sleeps the whole night through, hardly waking up to ask for a breast. We, parents, are discovering that it is possible for a baby to be awake without crying and we are feeling blessed for that.

briefly, we are better

Last week's storm was rapidly over and since then it has been sunny. My state of panic seems to have been sorted out with the appropriate homeopathic remedy (thanks to Leila's doctor who agreed to take me for a consultation straight after I cried during hers), and Leila also responded very well to her remedy. On top of that someone is now working in our house helping with the girls and the chores and that has changed my life (and my whole perspective on the world as it is these days in Ouro Preto). Cristiano left for one week in the field and my mum and Leila jumped on the opportunity to become best friends.

We had a little more trouble with the authorities here, or let us say some admin to sort out because of course there is NO procedure to declare a child who was born at home in Ouro Preto with a South African midwife. A million phone calls (most of wh

ich were given by Munyke whom we definitely cannot live without!), a trip to the hospital (where Coline was not allowed in) and a couple of "illegal" steps later (taken by some rare understanding officials) we were allowed to declare our child (in spite of everybody on the way saying that she is too tall to be only two weeks old...). And so I officially gave birth to

Coline Juliet Lana

on March 22nd, at our home, in the presence of 3 witnesses: Natasha, my mum and Cristiano. Two of them (witnesses) had to be there to sign the declaration, and so

not only were we lucky that my mum extended her stay, but Cristiano had to come back from the field so that there could be there together before she leaves.

Smooth birth does not seem to combine well with smooth admin...

Finger and footprinted: hard to see but my thumb and her foot are blue

The dark side of the moon

After reading some of your comments on the pictures and emails from my friends I feel that I have to add a few words. These days life in our family is all but smooth and peaceful. On the other hand Coline is, so far. She sounds like a kitten when she wants to feed. But everybody else around is experiencing a little bit of chaos. The pictures on previous posts do reflect a moment of reality though. And I am grateful for these moments where Leila is calm enough to be with us, when she holds her sister with care, when she plays mummy with her dolls, and when she softly dried my tears at the doctor today. But most of the time I am filled with fear and guilt. I fear that I am not going to make it when my mum is gone and I have to take care of both of them. Getting Leila to do anything that does not involve play in the way that she feels like at that particular minute is mission impossible. And I feel guilty because I do not want to be with Leila. I just want to hold Coline, look at her on my breast, and lie down with her in bed for most of the day. And it hurts when Leila comes and wants to touch Coline so much but is so restless that I want to send her off far far away. It hurts because I know I love her but I just do not want to be with her now.

big sister and her daddy