big fat laugh

We have a guest at home these days and last night at dinner he shared a big fat laugh with us. Coline was having her favorite finger food: soup and it would be more appropriate to say that her bib - jersey - pants - and shoes were having it. Tintin and Scratchy were at her feet, "helping" sort out the mess. Meanwhile Cristiano was busy commenting on how difficult it is to deal with children for a whole week-end. Just then, Leila aka Princess Fiona let an improbable soup burp escape her comparatively minute body and as I turned to witness her genuinely proud face I saw the cat jump onto the dinner table to which I responded with a loud and scary bang on the table. And this is where the only option for us all was to crack laughing, because really, this seemed just like a Tim Burton scene where the next thing to come, had we not laughed, could have been a set of false teeth in the soup or our gecko friend falling from the ceiling.

The moral of the evening was something along those lines: Go with the flow and dinner is a feast. Resist it and you'll realize you're sinking in a muddy puddle.

There was a photo session at Leila's ballet school today. Leila picked her clothes,  asked me to arrange her hair in a specific way, and put on some make up (well, the pink blush that the neighbor gave her since I have not yet given in for make up) and had a practice on the roof. Then she got to the ballet school and they "fixed" her (I suppose this is what they had in mind). Leila was pleased, she came home full of eye shadow and what not. I, on the other hand, wonder why some people think that I would be inclined to buy a picture of Leila made up as an adult or a doll rather than one of her being herself. Here is a place where girls should be dolls and I find it dull, unlike Leila, of course.

Anyway, we had a good time on the roof, until Leila stepped on my one and only survival head of swiss chard.

war and peace

I emerged today from 5 days sick in bed with an upset tummy and rediscovered the beauty of being alive and healthy. Coincidentally (really?) Leila's mood also flipped from unbearable - I realize this is subjective - to flowery, which is the least I could do with given that for the first time in Coline's life I am alone with the girls as Cristiano went for a field trip.

I cannot describe how I felt (soft, touched, blessed) when at dinner tonight Coline patiently, delicately, took my hand from her plate, in a way that meant that she could manage feeding herself without my help. And of course I let her, even though it was soup and she was handling it as finger food (another very subjective notion). There has been so much fighting with Leila lately that this moment of peace just seemed unreal. I hope that Leila and I will find a way out of the aggressive relationship we are in, which on the occasion I became conscious of.

Coline's walk and talk

Coline now walks all by herself. It almost went unnoticed because she has been walking all over the place for months, holding our hands, the walls or furniture, but what a wonderful feeling it seems to be for her to be able to get there quick full of stuff in both hands.

She is also talking a bit more, and although her words are generally te-te, papa, mama, she uses another one a lot: "Leila". Leila of course means Leila, but it also means dummy and chocolate, which are strictly Leila's territory even though Leila does her best to take Coline down that path (the only obstacle to Coline's reaching the chocolate territory being me), and Leila also means "I'm sore!" It was a bit of a shock for me to come to that conclusion. Coline had used the word many times when in pain but I could not allow myself to believe it until Cristiano and I found Coline pointing at Leila and saying through her tears in a heartbreaking complaint "Lei-laaaaaaa". We then realized that "Leila" is what she says when her fingers get caught, when she bangs her head or gets scratched by the cat. Well, she also said Leila with a sad face when we dropped Leila at school last Wednesday, for they like it when the other one is around.

Leila's activities

I was going to talk about what Leila plays, but after I made a little mental list I decided to entitle this post Leila's activities - same, same. Leila likes to dress up, like a princess or a ballerina, and make up too. She fancies particularly the dresses and skirts that I sew for her as she plays with my sewing stuff while Coline sleeps, on week-ends. Her being grateful for what I make for her obviously drives my productivity. She likes playing mummy and daddy with daddy, mummy and daughter with her friends, school and hide and seek with us and Coline, she likes racing with me, and sewing too, writing, creating presents for her friends, painting, she likes climbing and sliding down chairs and hills, jumping down steps and furniture, helping with meal preparation, baking cakes, and she masters the skills of sticking a spoon on her nose.

What a glorious age it is to be almost 4! and how fun it is for us too. I cannot imagine that any other time will be better than now, with a 4 year-old and a 1-year old, one out of the tantrum phase, the other not yet in it, so much laughter, so up for anything we suggest. Yesterday was mother's day and I was so grateful to be me, with my family.

And did I mention that they both are amazing clowns?

Lunches have been difficult lately and Leila has not been very keen to go to school, but my secret weapon has been lunch at the park near our house, what a wonderful moment we had.